Your whole life is the sum and subtotal of the kind of choices you make.  They say that destiny is the ultimate decider but I think in the larger sense, it’s how you choose determines your destiny.  I am always given to self-analysis especially when I am in a dark mood.  I’ve never opted for regrets for the kind of choices I’ve made; however I deeply regret that I was not given the opportunity to become another kind of man.  A man without baggage, light on his feet, a rolling stone that gathers all the moss but never takes root anywhere.  But here I am, presented with a fait-accomplish and asked to choose. 

  So, I chose knowledge over ignorance, being a discerning individual over being a philistine, expanding of mind over narrowness of thinking, rationality over superstition, struggle over self-pity and Devil over God.  How far have I succeeded in my endeavor is not for me to decide.  Sometimes the net result has been a lot of personal anguish, but those were my choices and I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I hear a voice that says you are lucky, it could be worse.  What is luck after all, but fate’s cheating, giving you an illusion of power.  Whereas the best you can do is to get up every morning and try your best to keep disaster at bay.

I have a vision where anxiety and ambition are consuming each other; they are coalescing and diffusing, inflating and deflating.  I can see time accumulating like grains of sand and it will bury me in the end.